Stress: The Extinction Agenda
Pain, stress
My brain, can't even rest
It's hard to maintain the pressure on my chest
Excess frustration strikes!
Ever have a day where you just feel like crap, overloaded with stress? Sure, everyone has. Well that was my day today. Again.
I can't identify a single thing, not a single one, in my life that I feel good about right now. I work a job I have no interest in, and which furthermore conflicts deeply with my principles; since moving to Sunnyvale in July I have saved zero, ZERO, money even though I'm paying less than half the rent I was paying in San Francisco; simply for the enjoyment of living in a city, I'm considering a move to D.C. where not only would I do the same job I do now, I'd actually have to work much harder and also be locked into this industry for at least another year; I have no concrete plan, or even real idea, of how to move toward a job/career that I am interested in; I've let my relationships with my entire family continue to be mostly superficial, which has become an even bigger problem as there's currently some drama playing out that I need to get involved in; Ladan and I have been living apart for four months now and our problems are continually exacerbated by the distance; I hate, frickin' hate the room I am prisoner in/renting in a house in Sunnyvale, but can't move right now because I may move to D.C. soon; I had to spend six hundred frickin' dollars on my car last week for service, more than two-thirds of which was for the damn labor; and other similarly frustrating issues that I don't want to delve into here.
My mind is scattered in a hundred directions and as a result I can't concentrate on any single one. I try to read a book, I get distracted. Watch some TV, I feel restless. Play a computer game, lose interest in ten minutes. I sit in this room, and I feel trapped, caged, with nowhere to go.
I need to break out of this house/job/situation/life, and I need to do it like, right now. Each day that goes by with no resolution, I almost feel as if I'm losing a bit of my sanity.
My brain, can't even rest
It's hard to maintain the pressure on my chest
Excess frustration strikes!
Ever have a day where you just feel like crap, overloaded with stress? Sure, everyone has. Well that was my day today. Again.
I can't identify a single thing, not a single one, in my life that I feel good about right now. I work a job I have no interest in, and which furthermore conflicts deeply with my principles; since moving to Sunnyvale in July I have saved zero, ZERO, money even though I'm paying less than half the rent I was paying in San Francisco; simply for the enjoyment of living in a city, I'm considering a move to D.C. where not only would I do the same job I do now, I'd actually have to work much harder and also be locked into this industry for at least another year; I have no concrete plan, or even real idea, of how to move toward a job/career that I am interested in; I've let my relationships with my entire family continue to be mostly superficial, which has become an even bigger problem as there's currently some drama playing out that I need to get involved in; Ladan and I have been living apart for four months now and our problems are continually exacerbated by the distance; I hate, frickin' hate the room I am prisoner in/renting in a house in Sunnyvale, but can't move right now because I may move to D.C. soon; I had to spend six hundred frickin' dollars on my car last week for service, more than two-thirds of which was for the damn labor; and other similarly frustrating issues that I don't want to delve into here.
My mind is scattered in a hundred directions and as a result I can't concentrate on any single one. I try to read a book, I get distracted. Watch some TV, I feel restless. Play a computer game, lose interest in ten minutes. I sit in this room, and I feel trapped, caged, with nowhere to go.
I need to break out of this house/job/situation/life, and I need to do it like, right now. Each day that goes by with no resolution, I almost feel as if I'm losing a bit of my sanity.
posted by GregP at 8:13 PM
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